Happy Anniversary!

You know what's great about getting married on December 31st?

You always have a date for New Year's Eve.

Happy 2nd anniversary to my wonderful husband. And happy New Year's Eve to everyone else!

Thank you all...

...for an amazing birthday weekend! If this weekend is any indicator, 32 is going to be a fabulous year. How's about a photo recap?

Festivities began with a small gathering of, oh....twenty-something of our closest family and friends.

Andi and I enjoyed a lovely fire-side dinner.

Alyssa earned major kudos for exercising incredible willpower amongst all the chips-n-salsa goodness AND for keeping her eyes open in this photo with Chris.

Mom and I enjoyed the fireside.

And Jordon really liked the sour cream.

Rebecca and Mom both got the "wear black and look fabulous" memo.

Brent with his eyes open? We're on a roll now.

And here's...........Sophie! Did I mention she's 3 inches taller than me now? And 20 years younger?

And here's the guy who knows how to throw one heckuva party.

I remember having a good time last night...but where the heck did this baby come from???

Now you know if you feed it, it's going to keep coming back.

Or maybe this is our new nephew, Anthony Cole.

WARNING: I talk a lot about bras in this post

Today marks 3 months a 1 week since chemo... and I totally have the hair to prove it! Not to mention, 8 weeks and 3 days post-op. In honor of those really random milestones, I'm going to share with you something none of the cancer books out there will tell you. And that's that somewhere along this wild and wacky cancer journey, you find yourself at Target making purchases like this...

Your eyes do not deceive you. Exhibit A is the grown-up version of a training bra. And Exhibit B? Oh yes, those are in fact, fake toenails.

Pourquoi? you ask. Tissues expanders render bras effectively useless and unnecessary. I've heard from several ladies who, while under construction, abandoned the garment altogether. Their bras had become the appendix of their wardrobe. But despite the fact that I evicted my appendix (is anything else going to try to kill me this year?), the bra habit is a hard one to break. So is it too much to ask for one without ridiculous wiring or padding, that doesn't look like it belongs on a tween-aged girl or nursing home patient?  Where's that in the Victoria Secret catalog?

Fortunately something that isn't difficult to find is fake toenails. Now there's a sentence I never expected to write. For any of this to make any sense, we have to go way back to my post from October 10th where I wrote about some weird bruising under the nail of my left big toe. Long-ish story short, the nail took the last 2 months gradually lifting and finally fell off. I have my good friend taxotere to thank for that. So now I've got a yicky looking nub of a nail left. But instead of leaving you with a picture of that (ain't nobody got time for that), you get this one...


Me and Mom with Monica in DC. Remember all that post-chemo hair I metioned? That isn't it. That is vintage mink.



How's about a treatment update? Part I

Recently I came across a blog called the big scary 'C' word and realized two things. Number one: I've been a particularly lazy blogger. And number two: I haven't blogged much about what's next in the wacky world of cancer treatment. Namely, radiation and tamoxifen. This fellow blogger does a really good job of writing about both, pop on over to her blog to read up. Go ahead. I'll wait. 

Click HERE to read about radiation and HERE to read about tamoxifen.

Are you done yet? Okay, good. The first thing you may have noticed is that she refers to radiation as radiotherapy. The second thing you may have noticed is that she's British. Which should explain words like tumour and oestrogen. Both of which are driving my spell-check crazy right now.

Since I have been - as she puts it - foot loose and cancer-free since October, the new name of the game is preventing recurrence. Or - as the most recent radiation oncologist we met with calls it - a failure. There are two types of failures we're trying to prevent, local and distant. Local meaning the same breast cancer comes back in the same place, distant meaning the breast cancer pops up somewhere else. Like my bones. Which is apparently a popular spot for breast cancer to wander off. Perhaps cancer cells have sat through too many time share presentations. 

Now if you've been playing along at home, you're probably thinking "After a mastectomy, how can the same cancer come back in the same place?" Good question. All the breast tissue is gone, so where could the cancer come back...right? Right... a mastectomy significantly decreases the risk of local failure, and in turn greatly increases survivability. (Yes, yes MY survivability. Not the cancer's.) But local failure is still possible in the chest wall, the remaining axillary nodes, and internal mammary nodes. And for that we have a few lines of defense. 

Number one is the continued rounds of herceptin infusions I'll receive until next May. Lucky number 11 of 17 is coming up next week. 

Number two is adjuvant hormone therapy in the form of tamoxifen.The current plan is one pill a day for the next five years. But recent studies have found that ten may be more beneficial. Ten years that is, not ten pills. But that doesn't start until we know more about radiation. Which brings us to...

Number three. Radiation therapy. Rob and I met with a second rad onc (Dr. B) on Thursday. At the recommendation of the first rad onc (Dr. G). Dr. B was essentially in the same boat as Dr. G - though she did share with us some new information. New in that I don't recall having heard it before. Which is not to say that's actually the case as it's entirely possible that a few bits and pieces have slid past me in the last 8 months. Speaking of 8 months... tomorrow marks exactly 8 months of this wild ride. Are you all tired yet? 'Cause I sure am. Anyway... staging is the name of the game in the world of radiation oncology. Stage IIb breast cancer patients generally are not recommended for radiation because the potential benefits are not strong enough to out-weigh the potential risks. Stage III breast cancer patients, however, do see a benefit. Simple enough, right? Now what's the difference between IIb and III? Here's where it gets tricky.

Stage IIb involves a tumor between 3 - 5 cm and axillary node disease. Which I - for certain - had. Stage III also involves internal mammary node disease. Which - based on an MRI from April - is possible that I may have had. Because I've had both neoadjuvant chemotherapy and surgery since then, and all of the cancer is gone, there's really no way of telling now if there was mammary node involvement.So Dr. B neither strongly discourages nor encourages radiation. And Rob and I are left to weigh the pros and cons. 

But more on that later. For now, it's bedtime. And physical therapy comes awfully early in the morning. Round number five tomorrow!

UPDATE:You're Invited!

Saturday December 22nd

6:00pm
Uncle Julio's 
(14900 Potomac Town Place, Woodbridge)

Firebirds

(15100 Potomac Town Place, Woodbridge)

I know I talked a really good game about throwing a kick-ass "I Survived 2012" party. While we're not lacking in celebratory spirit, time and energy are running short. So we're going to let Firebirds Uncle Julio's do all the work. Join us there for dinner. Followed by birthday cake and cocktails - or birthday cake flavored cocktails - later that evening at our house.

This being my 32nd birthday, trust me when I say I understand just how hectic schedules can be this time of year. (My actual day of birth was in conflict with a Christmas party Mom and Dad were supposed to attend.) So give us a heads up if you can join us for dinner, or drinks, or both. And if you can't, raise a glass that night for all that you've survived this year. Cheers!

UPDATE 16 Dec:  We're moving the par-tay to Uncle Julio's. 'Cause fine Mexican food is much more fitting of surviving the Mayan Apocalypse. And birthday margaritas!

On the twelfth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me

(sing it with me now!)

Twelve weeks since chemo

Ten rounds of Herceptin

Six weeks since surgery

Three PT sessions

and 40 more CCs of saaaaaaaaaline

Rob and I finally made it back to the gym this week. Not too shabby for 6 weeks post-op, I'd say. I'd also say that 30 minutes of cardio...kicked...my...ass. Also, our gym opened a beautiful new facility complete with swimming and basketball. Neither of which I actually do, but I'm glad to see our membership money is well spent. And they've cleverly placed all of the cardio machines at the top of three flights of stairs. So I kinda feel like my workout is half-way finished before I've officially started.

In other news, my physical therapist is awesome. And only partially because she tells me I'm the smallest patient she's worked with. Which is only a little ironic, because I must have at least 15 - 20 pounds on her. She's tiny, but awesome. And my arm is already moving much more easily, which is also awesome.

What's not-so-awesome is still waiting on the verdict about radiation. To say Dr. G is very thorough would be an understatement. I like that about her. Despite exhaustive research, the risks versus benefits scale is still pretty evenly balanced. So I'll meet with a different Rad Onc next week and see what she has to say.

In the meantime, I got what should be my last saline injection in my tissue expanders yesterday. Another 40 cc's each side... I think. I wasn't really paying that close of attention. Let's just say, they feel quite full. TMI, you say?

Well on that note, I'll leave you with this picture of me and Mom waiting for Santa at the train station...

Unfortunately, we could not get Rob on a pair of ice skates. So you'll just have to settle for THIS ALBUM of other Christmas magic.

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na... BATMAN!

Session #1 of physical therapy in done! One down, seven more to go. With the exception of one of the stretches feeling an awful lot like a brazilian jiu-jitsu paintbrush, I'd say it all went pretty well. And now I've got a handy-dandy sheet of exercises to work on at home in between my PT sessions.

Oh! And in addition to the axillary web syndrome, I learned that I also have a winged scapula. Also common in mastectomies with axillary node dissection.

So my should blade doesn't look nearly as bad as the guy's in this video, but the video is still pretty educational. And if you're not educated by it, then you'll at least be entertained by the narrator. His accent is fantastic!

And that is why I'm now adding Batman to my list of super-hero powers. Spider-Man... Batman... what's next? If I have to have radiation, can I add The Hulk to the list?

I like the Christmas Jesus best

Treating cancer is a little bit like saving money by buying stuff ('cause it was on sale). Sure, you get rid of the cancer. But in the process, you break a bunch of other stuff that wasn't broken before.

Today I met with a physical therapist for a lymphedema evaluation and to discuss the now limited range of motion in my left arm. Lymphedema is a common result of axillary dissection, and the rate of suffering from it significantly increases once you've had greater than 7 axillary lymph nodes removed. Because I'm now lacking 21 of mine it's a good idea to a get a baseline evaluation - even though I'm not experiencing any symptoms. The eval was helpful in that it also goes over ways to prevent developing symptoms. That includes wearing a compression sleeve when flying (I hope they come in different colors!) and avoiding repetitive motion. The PT's best example of this was scrubbing the bath tub, so I'm gonna say I'm off bathroom cleaning duty for a while. 

Impact on range of motion is also a pretty common side effect from a mastectomy and axillary dissection. So where my left arm used to move 180 degrees like it's supposed to, now it's closer to 120 degrees (lifting to the side) and 150 degrees (lifting to the front). To what do I owe this pleasure? Oh, just a little something called lymphatic cording. Which means I've got 4 weeks of physical therapy to look forward to. 

UPDATE: I just found that the other name for lymphatic cording is Axillary Web Syndrome. Here's a pretty good link explaining it. Also, I'm adding Spider-Man to my list superhero powers.

Now right here is where I was going to whine and complain about that. But decided instead to share this with you. Moxie as little baby Jesus. Enjoy!



So maybe that's not actually Moxie, but a very convincing likeness courtesy of a Christmas card I found at World Market.



What's new...

...since my last post? Let's see...

I got my fourth and final drain removed last Thursday! 

As a recap for those of you playing along home; post-op I came home with two surgical drains on each side. Both right side drains were removed on Day 10. One left side drain was removed on Day 17, and the other on Day 24. In case you were wondering, they kinda look a little something like this...

Should we talk about how much fun it is to shower and wear normal clothes with these hanging from you for over three weeks? No? Alright then... moving on!

After the last drain was removed, my tissue expanders received their second saline injection. Another 40 cc's on each side, putting each at right around 305 cc's. There's probably some very advanced math that converts expander cc's to bra size, but I have no idea what that formula is. I do, however, know that my regular, pre-mastectomy bras fit pretty well now. They're just really uncomfortable because the expanders don't move. At all. 

That means that I've got another week or two to let the expanders settle and relax ('cause no one likes an uptight tissue expander) before their next injection. Dr. M explained that once the right size is reached, he gives one additional injection - a 10% overfill - to allow the final implant a little extra room. So I may only have one more injection in my future. Woohoo! 

After the final injection, how long I have the tissue expanders in before they are exchanged for the final implants will depend on radiation (more on that in a minute). Here are the two possible scenarios...

Scenario #1: The radiation oncologist (Dr. G) gives me her blessing that the remaining tissue and nodes don't need radiation. Dr. M gives the tissue expanders a final injection in a week or two. And I can schedule the exchange surgery (exchanging the tissue expanders for the final implants) for 4 to 6 weeks after the last injection. 

Scenario #2: Dr. G does recommend I receive radiation in addition to the neo-adjuvant chemotherapy and bilateral mastectomy I've already received. Radiation would begin in roughly two weeks (they like to allow for 4 to 6 weeks post-op recovery). I would receive treatment five days a weeks for six weeks. Then... I would have an additional 6 months of recovery - allowing my skin to heal - before the exchange surgery. 

Now, to radiate or not to radiate? That is still being discussed and decided. According to Dr. G, here are the reasons to radiate...

1) My age. Because I'm young, my risk is high for the old cancer to come back or a new one to show up.

2) My cancer cells had a "high growth factor". Meaning they liked to move fast. 

3) I had positive lymph nodes. Again, the cancer cells were on the move before we stopped them in their tracks. 

And the reasons not to radiate...

1) My age. The radiation can cause damage to my heart and lungs. Which is bad in general, but worse if I plan to use them for the next 60 years. 

2) My cancer cells were triple positive (estrogen, progesterone, and Her2) and responded really well to treatment. Which is a good indicator that I'll have a lot of success continuing Herceptin and adding Tamoxifen. Meaning those two drugs are likely enough to keep me in the clear for the next 5 years. 

So that's the latest. Happy Thanksgiving to all! Try not to mow anyone down in your Black Friday shopping-induced excitement. 

Hello...hello...is this thing on?

Yup, still here. Cleverly disguised as a really lazy blogger. So tomorrow will be the three week anniversary of my surgery and Tuesday will be my first day back to work in as much time. What's new since my last post? Well...

I got to watch Marissa compete in a regional cheer competition. There may be some bias here, but holy crap is she amazing. #soproud

We had dinner with Alyssa and Chris. And made brilliant election predictions. Then I slept through all of the election night coverage. #surpriseme

In an attempt to keep me from going completely stir crazy, Mom took me to see Cloud Atlas. Which I highly encourage everyone go see. Mostly because I have no idea what it was about and need all of you to explain it to me. #whatthehelljusthappened

Rob took me back to Dr. M's for my first saline injection. Which looks a little something like this...

This graphic is slightly inaccurate, in that my tissue expanders are beneath my pecs - stretching muscle. But...we forgot to take pictures at the appointment and this is the best one Google images had to offer. 

...Dr. M injected 40 cc's on each side and has got me scheduled to come back this Thursday for another 40-50 cc's. I was hoping to get rid of both my remaining surgical drains this week, but #2 has still been producing too much fluid. So at almost 3 weeks post-op, I've still got one very annoying drain left. #fingerscrossedthatitcomesoutthisweek

I got to visit - and shop - with Grandma yesterday where her community hosted a holiday bazaar. Also where I got loads of compliments on my haircut. #lovestylishlittleoldladies

And today I made Rob drive almost two hours to look at a bunch of really old rocks. #thatmanmustreallyloveme

Click HERE for our entire album of really old rocks!

Oh, almost forgot! And I received this in the mail...

...I'm gonna give you a minute for this irony of this to sink in. #areyoufrigginkiddingme

Warning! mildly graphic content below...

...but it's really not that bad, so don't be such a sissy. But first...

 Major accomplishments of the day!

1. Upgrading from yoga pants and tennis shoes to jeans and ballet flats.

2. Getting 2 of my 4 surgical drains removed. 

3. Having the steri-strips removed from my incisions. 

4. Getting a clear pathology report!

Today was 10 days post-op (and 7 weeks since last chemo - but who's counting), which meant ALL the docs wanted to see me. Dr. B was first up and went over the pathology of everything she removed during surgery. Long story short, chemo kicked some major cancer ass! 

Dr. B (surgical oncologist) removed 21 left axillary lymph nodes and their biopsy came back cancer-free. The invasive ductal carcinoma - which was a 3x3x2 cm tumor just a mere six months ago - gone. The only thing the chemo hadn't sent running and screaming was the ductal carcinoma in situ. There was still a 2.2 cm tumor hanging out in the evil twin. But not anymore, thanks to surgery. And the good twin? All pathology was clear there, too. Mad props to Dr. B!

Now, to radiate or not to radiate? That is the question. Which will be answered by Dr. G, the radiation oncologist. Stay tuned. 

Next stop was Dr. F (medical oncologist), who remains super psyched about how well the chemo kicked major cancer ass. Her recommendation? Stay the course with Herceptin (8 infusions down, only 9 more to go) and hold off on Tamoxifen until the jury has decided on radiation, or not. Also, go for another echo at the beginning of year.Three snaps in a Z formation for Dr. F!

Last stop was Dr. M (reconstructive surgeon), who was super impressed with how well/quickly my incisions are healing. I attribute that to the fact that I am now part vampire... or Wolverine... or something.

This is the right side (good twin) where two of my drains were removed today. Looking suspiciously like vampire bites.

And this is the "before" photo. As in before the drains came out. See? Not that bad.

Hopefully the two left side (evil twin) drains will be ready to come out by Monday or Tuesday. Then I'll be back in Dr. M's office next Thursday for my first tissue expander fill. He left both 450 cc expanders about half full at the time of surgery. Starting next week, I'll go in once or twice a week for the expanders to gradually be injected with saline. Kinda like getting your braces adjusted... but different. Anyway, slowly filling the expanders gets my muscles ready for the implants that will eventually replace them. The expanders, that is, not my muscles. They're staying just where they are, if only a lot more limber. So tissue expanders are kinda like really intense yoga for your pec muscles. 

I have no idea what's going on here, but tissue expanders look way less painful than this.

Happy Halloween!

It's official. I've become that crazy dog lady. 

Happy Halloween everyone!

What do a full week of pajamas + trash TV + naps on the couch equal? Too much of a good thing, that's what! So after the roads were cleared from hurricane Sandy (our neighbor had a tree go down, fortunately the only thing it took out was another neighbor's mailbox and the exit from our neighborhood)... I put on real clothes... and left. the. house!

That's right, an over-sized cable knit sweater can hide a multitude of figure flaws. Even tissue expanders and surgical drains.

Somehow I don't think these are the lovely lady lumps Fergie had in mind, but they'll have to do for now.

Happy, happy birthday...

...from all of us to you! I've never worked for TGIFridays or anywhere else that subjects its birthday celebrants to a ridiculous song. So for this post we'll just keep it simple and say...

Happy Birthday, Mom!

In addition to that milestone, there are a few others worth celebrating on this, my 6th day post-op. Taking my first unassisted shower, going up and down the stairs on my own, and wearing a pull-over shirt. I know, now I'm just showing off. Oh! And I bid adieu to my On-Q today. While I'm sure it was doing me a world of wonder in the pain management department, it's one accessory I'm more than happy to get rid of. And you know what Coco Chanel always said, always take off one accessory before leaving the house. Now if I could just get rid of this drain belt...

Hi everyone. Thank you so much for all of the texts, emails, calls and visits. Monday turned out to be a really long day - particularly for those of you in the lobby...

And I'm really sorry that I didn't get to see everyone after you'd been waiting all that time...

But all of your flowers and gifts were the perfect pick-me-up. Thank you...

After much insistence on my part, they finally released me at about 7:30 last night...

And now I'm home-sweet-home with some new accessories...

So feel free to stop by and pay a visit.

Yesterday went pretty much like this...

Photo credit: The Bloggess

So today we went here...

See more photos from our Skyline Drive adventure HERE

And tomorrow will be a lot like this...

Have a great night everyone!

Went to the doctor and the doctor said...

I will have a warm, cozy bed waiting for me at Fairfax Hospital this Monday. Between both surgeons, I should be under for about 6 hours. "Coming to" just in time for dinner... how convenient.

If you're in the area and want to stop by and pay a visit (who wouldn't? hospital food is delicious), follow signs for the Grey entrance to the Surgery Center. 

Parking in the Grey garage is $5. Or you can be all fancy and use the valet... which is still $5. A small price to pay to see me in all of my just-coming-out-of-anesthesia glory.

Seriously, that is well worth the cost of admission. If you think I'm funny now, just wait until I'm under the influence. Maybe not as funny as this girl... but pretty close.

God is in my mouth? I love god.

Amen to that, sister. If hospitals aren't really your thang - there are so many sick people there - feel free to come on by the house. And bring lunch. Or dinner. No, seriously.

In the meantime, I'll try to keep you updated. But Rob and Mom are going to be your best points of contact early in the week. Email me if you need their contact info.

Have a great weekend!

Time flies when you're having...fun?

And by fun, I mean cancer... which isn't fun at all. It's the exact opposite of fun. Seriously, cancer sucks. But time does fly. That occurred to me as Rob and I were driving home from my pre-op appointment with the reconstructive surgeon and I realized that today is my six month cancerversary. That's right, I was diagnosed 6 months ago today.

In honor of that, and in honor of all of you who have kept truckin' right along with me, this milestone calls for a little Dead. 

What a looooooong strange trip, indeed. I'll have more for you tomorrow about what the surgeon said and next week's day o' surgery. For tonight? It's time for me to go eat this and watch Up All Night.

Maybe I'll share some of this with Rob. Maybe.

Today was brought to you by the number FOUR

That's right, if you've been playing along at home, you may notice that tomorrow marks my FOUR week final-chemo-versary. So what have I been doing with the luxury that not going to chemo has granted me? 

First I had to recover from #6 - that sneaky little bastard. Bouncing back took a little bit longer than I expected. And the nurses are seriously not kidding when they say chemo effects are cumulative. Random side effect of this round? Bruising underneath the nail of my big toe on my left foot (aka fat foot). I'll spare you a photograph here. Pedicures are a no-no during chemo (high risk of infection) and these little piggies are not ready for their close-up, Mr. Demille. 

Anyway... weird bruised toenail aside, Rob and I spent Sunday cheering for the 'Skins.

What's that? You do your cheering from the stands? Don't be silly, the endzone is where it's at. Click HERE for more football goodness.

As if that wasn't enough excitement, I've also been growing a little bit of hair. Sort of. See?

Okay, so it kinda looks like a weird shadow here. But I promise you, that is actual hair you see there.

Next up in the power of four? Yoga on the Steps is just FOUR very short - and very chilly - days away. Whose idea was it to set the thermostat to Fall, anyway? Fortunately the weather in DC is supposed to be beautiful on Sunday. And... fortunately YOU still have FOUR days to join the Young Survival Coalition team.

Click HERE to join my team!

Thanks to your generosity, my fundraising goal has been blown out of the water. If you haven't had the opportunity to donate to a fantastic organization that helps those diagnosed with breast cancer... lucky for you here's another chance! My brother Dave is walking the American Cancer Society Making Strides Against Breast Cancer.

Click HERE for Dave's fundraising page and to make a donation. 

That's all I've got for you today. It's time to go watch Animal Practice. Hey...isn't that on channel FOUR? Okay, now I'm just creeping myself out. 

Honestly, what's funnier than a monkey wearing scrubs? Nothing, that's what.

Redskins All-Star Survivors Celebration

First things first. To everyone on Facebook, I apologize for jamming up your newsfeed with all things Washington Redskins for the last two days.

For anyone not on Facebook and have no idea what I'm talking about... here's what you missed.

The American Cancer Society and the Washington Redskins hosted an event at Redskins Park called the All-Star Survivors Celebration. The fifth-annual, to be exact. Right here is where I'd normally take the time to describe the event in great detail, along with 27 8x10 color glossy photographs. But... since WJLA and WTOP already went through the trouble, I'll let them tell you all about it.

Click HERE for the news story that aired on ABC News 7

HERE for the WTOP article,  

More than pink cleats: Redskins take breast cancer tribute personally

HERE for the redskins.com article,  

Cooley Returns For All-Star Survivor Event (be sure to watch the video, too)

And HERE for the Redskins blog post,  

Survivors Celebration Fun Time For All 

Here are a few of my favorite photos from the day. You can check out the rest of my album HERE. 

Alyssa was my "care taker" for the day. And by "care taker" I mean she helped me carry all the great stuff they gave us, volunteered me for interviews with local media, and talked to the players about their shoes and their favorite fast food restaurants. Here we are with #92 Chris Baker, #90 Doug Worthington (and you think Rob is tall), and #46 Alfred Morris.

Doug - we're on a first name basis now, I can call him Doug - anyway, Doug gave us a tour of the facilities. Including the locker room. And let us try on his gear.

Alyssa opted for holding the helmet - ponytails and helmets do not work well together (non-bald people problems). And Mrs. Daniel Snyder (you can call her Tanya) joined us for a photo.

 Now if you'll excuse me... I've got a whole lotta thank you notes to write.